About Lipstick Cover-Up

This blog is about one woman facing each day - making it happen... surviving... putting up with... overcoming challenges... laughing or crying... and sharing her inner beauty - all while wearing Apricot Beige #7 or Frosted Rose.

Always remember...

"When you are a daughter, mother, sister or girlfriend--you are proof positive that daily surviving can be a beautiful thing."
-- Jodi Hills, Author of Slap on a Little Lipstick...You'll Be Fine

We had a great party

This past weekend, Saturday, was the picnic that we hosted for our neighborhood. I had this idea in August that wouldn't that be so nice, there were a lot of new families in the neighborhood that have moved in over the last 2 years and I really didn't know many of them. Lots of them have kids and many of the kids don't know eachother. So I planned this 1st annual picnic. I called it that hoping that it would go well and we'd do it again.

We had one of those big moon bounce things for the kids to play in and they had our playset as well, we had local fire/rescue/police come by to show off their cars and trucks and meet the neighborhood. We had a craft table for the kids, face painting, these rocket balloon things that were such a hit, I should've bought 4 packages instead of one! Lots of food and drink to go around as well. All that attended were asked to bring a side or a dessert, and their own beer or wine if they wanted it. We provided the entree selection and non-alcoholic beverages. It was in my backyard.

It went REALLY well. We had a great turnout, I met many new people and was able to reconnect with others in a different way. I appreciated the excitement people had, the fun they brought. I think they all enjoyed it. It was from 4p-7p, the last of the stragglers left around midnight, it was a lot of fun. One couple that has lived in the neighborhood for about 15 years used to have a big neighborhood halloween party each year and they haven't for about 8 or 9 years now, all the families started having kids, people moved, lost connections except to wave hello. The parties just stopped. They talked about having their party again this year and I think they will now. There is another family up the street, a lovely family, I relate to them well, they are from NY area, not to far from where my husband and I grew up. They share a lot of background as us and we have kids the same age. She is so funny! I never knew! They are having a Christmas party now, KIDFREE! Lots of fun with other adults! They've called about the date already and I'm really looking foward to it.

I was nervous about doing the party once I started planning it, but it all turned out wonderfully. It was such a fun day and night. I had more than a couple of SeaBreezes, my one neighbor made a pitcher for her and I to share, and they were so good! It's like drinking juice all night! Then you realize there some liquor in there?!? We had a good time though, no one got ugly or stupid, kids had a blast. Then again, that could just be my interpretation!

I remember growing up my parents having parties like this all the time. We could walk all around our neighborhood without fear or worry, we were safe. I was 5 riding my bike outside without a care in the world and everyone looked out for everyone else. I miss those days and though I know this one party doesn't change all that, I do hope it makes our neighborhood a little safer and friendlier, more welcoming.

Happy Birthday B!

B...that's what I call my husband, his name doesn't start with a B, but I'm forever saying, "Hey, B, can you take the trash out?" or some other request.

Well, today is his birthday. He's 38 today, whew! He's about 4 and half years older than me, he robbed the cradle, we met when I was a junior in high school. I like to say I was mature, but I think the truth is he was immature and maybe I was a litte mature for my age. The jury will remain out on that one. We met through a friend, they were dating at the time and we all became good friends. He was always around hanging out, playing cards, going on hikes, goofing off. He played in a basketball league with some folks I knew too.

When they broke up, we discovered that we really liked eachother, making my parents none to happy to be sure, my mother and I didn't speak for nearly 6 months, really. She wrote me this horrible letter, 10 pages long, with a litany of reasons I was too good for him, it was the wrong timing, she didn't like him, "when I hear his laugh I want to strangle him and tell him to SHUT UP" so very mean. She loves him now, I guess. I wasn't a failure because I had a high school sweetheart. I went to college, I'm successful, I'm happy most of the time. I love him dearly. I'm grateful for him even on the days where I'm pissed off at him, which some weeks seems like every other day...but we try and keep at it.

Happy Birthday my dear B! Thank you for being you, for loving me and your children unconditionally, for your grace under pressure, the sanity checks that you give me, the kind reminders that love can really conquer most things. You hold me when I need it, you leave me be and give me silence when I need it. In the face of many adversities over the years you've stood by me, by our family, our children. You didn't fall apart when I needed to and you were there to help pick me up.

I know I never knew your mother, you never did either with her dying when you were 2. But I thank her for having you. I know we argue, we disagree, somedays I scratch my head and wonder what the hell you're thinking, but when it all comes down there you are right beside me. Always loving me and our children.

We love you! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

Go Johnny go!

So today I'm out running an errand and there is this rasta man walking the mall, he looks angry and he is clapping FURIOUSLY...I've been hearing this for a couple of hours now while I'm on my second floor office working, this clapping, it gets really loud then slowly dies down, like someone is walking by and clapping. I thought maybe there was some kind of event going on and I just didn't have a chance to peer out the window to look. So I'm walking and I hear the clapping I look up and here is angry rasta man, clapping, the man can clap folks, LOUD, and he starts going really fast. When I see him I know what it is.

This is the same man who a month or so ago, walked up and down the mall ALL DAY LONG yelling, "OOOHHHH, OOOHHHH, OOOHHH!" He'd stare ya down yelling it, look to the sky, just kept on doing it, and carried a bible in his hands. That is all. Well, maybe he got complaints or the cops said something to him so now he's changed tactics and he's clapping. I was walking and on my cell phone making a call, when he saw that phone I swear he got really pissed and clapped right at me staring as if to say, "hey lady, I'm clapping her shut your yap!"

If you read my post from a few weeks back about the "go johnny go" whisper street man, you'll understand, but at the moment he was clapping really loud at me I thought to myself, "go johnny go johnny go go go"

I wish street people didn't freak me out so badly, not homeless people necessarily, but street people, they conduct their lives out there, like the shoeless tarot card man that sits down the block, as you walk by he'll holler out to you that you have a knight on horse with moon rising in your second house, like I know what that means...please don't scare me if I have a knight in my house on a horse I hope he's got a saddle bag full of cash with him!

Then there's the teenager, she's got tatoos galore, pink hair on tuesdays and a sign that says, "trying to get out of town, spare some cash?" Hey, I'm looking for a vacation too dear, let me know when you get yours. I feel for her, but she sits there, just joking with her buddies, smoking her cigarettes, from the view just goofing off. I wonder about her life, how she got here, where her mother is.

I always ask those questions, where's there family, friends, mother/sister/father/kids? What have thet gone through to come to this, and then the clapping man, what is making him clap, why is he so mad, I'm too scared to ask him, but I'm certain he's trying to convey something to me/us with his demonstration.

Go Johnny Go!

Yesterday

I read a lot of other people's posts yesterday and I didn't post one of my own. I was just very sad. I was grateful and proud of the people that worked and fought so hard to save others 5 years ago, for the bravery that they and all those who perished showed in the face of terror.

It was a very cool overcast dreary day here in Virginia yesterday, and 5 years ago it was a gorgeous morning. One of the men I worked with had just retired from the military after over 20 years, he worked for JAG. He always had the TV on in his office, silent, but on, watching the ticker line...he hollers out, "Kirsten turn on the TV something horrible is happening in New York I think the US is being attacked" I turn it on, I see the first tower smoking the people running and looking terrified. I pick up the phone and can't reach my husband or my dad, I call my best friend in NYC, he works at the building next door to Tower 1, I get him on the first ring. He's on the ferry looking at the towers, he's late to work and can't believe what he's seeing, then he says, "Oh my Lord, Kirsten there's another plane coming" It hits the other Tower. The ferry stopped after the first plane hit, it started going back to the Jersey side when the second plane hit.

That night my friend had over 40 people, he knew 8 of them, sleeping on the floor and sofas in his one bedroom apartment that was on the marina looking accross at the city. People got on ferries and just came over to the Jersey side with nowhere to stay or sleep. One of his coworkers called and said can I come over, i can't stay here. One turned into 3 into 8, and when he went to meet them at the ferry station, there were friends of his friends just standing around. Nowhere to go, can't reach anyone on cell phones. They all came and stayed at his place. They didn't sleep really he said, just looked out or stayed on the balcony and watched the skyline, watched the smoke, the TV.

I then got on the phone with my father. He was so deeply saddened, enraged, I can't even describe it well but I think you know what I'm saying here. Where we grew up in NY it was a suburb of NYC, lots of cops and firefighters. He talked to friends back home. The next 2 months would bring a long line of funerals of people he was acquainted with, his friend back home kept him posted. I've seen my dad go through a lot. Loss, pain, injury, heartache. But nothing that effected him like 9/11. He was forever different in several ways after that. He made moments count a lot after that. He became much more introspective and more critical of government than I'd ever seen him. He was a patriot, he had served in the Army. He loved his country and its people. He checked in with all of us that day, several times. He told me it would be ok. Every 9/11 since his death I am mixed with so many feelings, about the day, the people who lost their lives, their families, their homes and way of life. And I think about him and I miss him.

I'm grateful for my life, my family, what I am blessed with. I just couldn't write about yesterday, well yesterday. It is just so raw on that day for me. I guess it probably always will be.

Weighing in...

Not on anything of great import, I mean literally weighing in....I started Weight Watchers I guess about 7 weeks ago now, or so, and I've done very well.

Those 3rd baby pounds just weren't going anywhere on their own so I figured I should get back into shape. Before I had my first child, I was in pretty good shape, same size as when I started college, a few pounds had moved around, but nothing major. I ran or walked and in college I taught aerobics classes. I loved it, especially the yelling and prancing about with a bunch of friends, felt like my old cheerleading days, and before anyone comments on that let me just say IT IS A SPORT DAMMIT, at least the way we did it.

I launguished a bit, ok a lot, after my first 2 kids, Loud Girl was 9 months old when I found out we were pregnant with Green Bean, and then after he arrived, 8 weeks later we found out about his heart issue, then 2 months later found out about Loud Girl's cancer, and 3 years later thought things were all on the mend. And I must say they have gone pretty good since then. Aside from the illness and death of my father who was an amazing man, I mean just look at me and my sisters, he was amazing right! Then my husband's long illness/issues along the way. You see, I just didn't pay much attention to myself anymore, and I was ok with it, no resentment there, it's just what had to be done, the place in life where I was. It's all good.

So then to last year, I decided I'm getting back in shape, I join WW, start up a regular work out routine, I lose 13 pounds very quickly (8 weeks or so) then low and behold find out that we are once again PREGNANT...wow, this really was not on the radar, we were so happy, very excited, more nervous than I can possibly covey in words, and very grateful to be blessed this way again. So no WW, they won't even let you in the meeting, insurance liability and stuff like that.

So we have Izzy last November and life keeps on moving. Shortly after school lets out for the kids this past spring, I'm visiting my sister, I see some pictures and i think, "HOLY CRAP, i LOOK LIKE A HEFFER!" So I do things on my own at first, working up the courage to go back to WW, I walk a lot more, I'm eating better, feeling better, and then I started back.

So that brings me to today, Thursdays are weigh in days for me. Now, I love this group of ladies at the meeting I go to, I never thought I'd like the meeting thing, but I really do, it's like a mini modified ladies night for me, with a few men thrown in the mix. These women are great, supportive, inspiring and beautiful people. I'd hang out with them anywhere. Just a lot of fun.

But, I had a great week last week, lost 3 pounds, wowie for me, so naturally I'm nervous about how I'll do today.

Just so you know, I don't look at this as a diet, it's a change of lifestyle for me, this is a road I'm choosing to be on, with many stops along the way, small goals if you will. I want to be around for many many years, I want to see my children grow up, I'd like to see my grand kids grow up if my children choose to have kids. I want my years to be full and happy, and not ill. I want to take care of this body I was blessed with. Which save for the regular imperfections a person finds in themselves, is pretty good at keeping me going. No major problems.

So I go to weigh in day always a little nervous and excited. I still have some of my pre kid clothes, and college items too, pretty soon they'll all be back in style I figure, I tried a couple on this past weekend, I'm getting close to having them actually look good!

I did it, and no injuries really

I did it! I'm so happy I finished, in under an hour, 55 minutes to be exact so just under a 14 minute mile, and I'm sure for some of you that's REALLY slow, but I was so happy with my results. I ran almost all of it, we walked fast for about a half a mile, on the 2 small uphills...I'm new to this and my training was slim so it had to be done, I only sprinted the last 60 yards or so, so it was a good jog the rest of the way...BUT my first road race is now under by belt AND next year I hope for my time to improve, I'm getting a jogging stroller next week from a friend, so can start to train at home with the baby since she usually does my 2 mile walks with me each day.

Thanks for all the kind thoughts...maybe in a month I'll really consider myself a "runner" I hope.

I could walk after, but let me tell you that on Sunday I wasn't sure I ever wanted to WALK again, my hip flexor muscle I think, the one that connects my hip to the knee, on the front of the thigh, they were very angry with their owner and when I walked down stairs I must have looked like some kind of freak, between my staggering, grimacing and yelping you'd of thought I was escaped from the loony bin and off my meds..."Sissy, where's my meds, AAGGGHHH" My dad used to tease us at the bus stop and come out of the house walking funny and yelling that so all the other kids could hear it and we'd feign embarassment, and be laughing so hard inside...well that's what I looked like folks. I'm better now and am happy that those were the only muscle groups to rebel all my swimming and walking must be doing something right!

Lots of love to you all and may you each enjoy the same satifaction I felt when I crossed that finish line sometime very soon!

-Lil'sis

running, jogging, walking

I think this is how it's going to be, I'm "running" in a local event tomorrow, it's a fund raiser for the Women's breast cancer research center...I'm excited, I've done Relay for Life for ACS for years, but this is just for a local center and I've never "run" 4 miles straight before that didn't involve some breaks and a treadmill...so outside in the elements.

Wish me luck!

 
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